The Most Random of Moments
by Zaxel
Summary: A collection of the most random moments shared between Dante and Nero. Shonen-ai. Fluff and Yaoi.
1. The Gift

_**The Most Random of Moments**_

**Summary:** A collection of the most random moments shared between Dante and Nero. Shonen-ai. Fluff.

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**Note: **Basically, to make life easy for everyone, Nero is staying with Dante in DMC. What happened to Kyrie? You decide her fate. :3 Enjoy.

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_1. The Gift_

The door opened with a loud booming sound when it was kicked open with angry force. The backs of the wooden doors cracked against the wall and bounced. Nero looked up to see Dante walking in casually, throwing his favorite red coat carelessly on the hanger as he passed by, and making his way to his desk.

The younger male kept his eyes on Dante, just watching him from the couch he was occupying while listening to his tech-metal music and flipping through a Gun and Ammo magazine he found while snooping around Dante's desk.

The son of Sparda threw his sword so it stabbed the wall and it simply hung there, just like the rest of his swords that decorated the shop. He smiled brightly when he spotted the pizza box on his desk and opened to find at least three slices waiting for him. He randomly picked a slice, nearly drooling by now, (it was still warm!) and took a big bite. Every time… it was like heaven.

He let the pizza hang from his mouth when he took the second bite as he removed his twin guns from their holsters and placed them on the top of his desk. He pulled the leather chair out to plop himself on it but stopped as soon as he saw a small red box wrapped with a black bow. He stared at it oddly, confused and picked it up idly.

A gift?

He looked from the wrapped present to Nero, who looked away the instant Dante turned his head. He smiled instantly. He thought it was cute how the boy tried to play it off… like he didn't do it. After nearly inhaling the slice of pizza, he walked over to the other silver headed boy and poked his head. Nero looked up at Dante with an irritated look and scowled while pulling off his headphones. "What?"

"Is this for me?" Dante sang in a childish tone.

Nero rolled his eyes… but nonetheless blushed. He shrugged and averted his sight back to the magazine. "Maybe."

"AWW!!"

Nero yelped in surprise when he was suddenly glomped, magazine and headphones magically flying off as he fell back against the couch.

"What the fuck, Dante?!" Nero practically yelled as he pushed off the older demon hunter and sat up.

"Stop acting all… girly on me," he mumbled. "It's weird."

"But you got me a gift!"

"Yeah, so? You haven't even opened it yet."

Dante let the gift sit on his lap for a second, tapping his fingers on the box and smiled softly. "That fact that you got me something… It's kinda cute."

"Yeah, whatever…" he mumbled again, blushing and scratching his head in embarrassment. "Just open it before I take the shit back."

Dante chuckled and unwrapped the present, and Nero watched as Dante pulled the box apart. The older man's blue eyes lit up in joy.

"AW-

"Please!" Nero instantly cut Dante off, outstretching his arms and waving his hands to keep Dante away. "Don't!"

It happened anyway.

"DAAH!" Nero fell backwards against the couch yet again with Dante smothering him to death. Dante only backed off when Nero punched him in the gut. Hard.

"Ow…" Dante groaned, sitting up and rubbing his belly. "That was my fuckin' stomach.

"Stop acting like a girl! I told you it freaks me out!" Nero scolded but then scowled when he realized what position they were in. "And get off me."

Dante shook his head and smirked, "Nope." He leaned down and gave the boy a sweet peck on the lips and said, "an awesome gift deserves and awesome thank you."

Nero chuckled, mimicking the same smirk the older adorned. "Before I'm awarded with this 'awesome thank you,' at least put it on. I want to see how it looks on you."

Dante sat up again, and removed the item from the box, discarding the wrapping and everything carelessly. Then Dante face faulted.

"Where's the other half?"

Nero sighed and lifted up his left arm, showing Dante the rest of his gift. It was a golden bracelet, but plain. The only thing that made it special was the single small charm that hung from it. It was a silver piece of a heart with Dante's name inscribed on it. Dante smiled and quickly put his own on. The colors on his bracelet were inverted, the chain was silver while the charm was gold with Nero's name inscribed on it.

"When did you do this?" Dante asked, finally succeeded in putting on the piece jewelry after 2 whole minutes.

"Uh…" Nero instantly blushed. "After our first time… and you told me you loved me."

"That was forever ago," Dante chuckled then, "wait…" he suddenly looked at Nero in question. "So with this… you're saying…?"

And Nero smiled. "I love you too, Dante."

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**Endnotes: **Hope you guys loved the retarded moment. :) I feel the need to just throw out some fluff until I summon up enough courage to write a hardcore yaoi with these guys. There's enough room for a lemon so maybe… I might just write it. :o look forward to it, folks. 'cuz it will happen.


	2. A Lesson on Sexuality

The Most Random Of Moments (02)

2. A Lesson on Sexuality

* * *

"Dante!" Nero cried in surprise.

"Ooh, squishy!"

Nero smacked Dante's offending hand away hard. He glared at the older demon hunter but the threatening look had no affect on Dante. The man only smirked pervertedly before reaching around Nero to grab his ass again.

"Dante! Stop it!" Nero was fuming… and flustered. His cheeks were a tinge of pink in embarrassment and was trying hard not to let the other see for he knew that if Dante found out that his little shameless act of touchy-feely was disturbing Nero greatly, then he'd keep with it for hours on end and never let the boy hear the end of it. But as luck would have it, Nero was figured out and a huge, sneaky grin formed on Dante's face.

"Oh ho? Flustered are we?" Dante teased.

"Fuck off," Nero snapped angrily as he pushed past the devil hunter roughly. "And stop touching me, you homo."

Before the boy got anywhere though, Dante grabbed Nero's rear once again and this time the younger devil hunter reacted violently, bringing his arm around and punching Dante in the stomach, knocking the wind out of him.

"Knock it off, Dante, or I'll break your hands," Nero spat bitterly as he stomped away and up the stairs to go to his room that Dante gave him. At the same time, Trish was walking down the steps and Nero stormed past her. She crossed her arms over her chest and gave Dante a knowing look.

"Do I have to ask?"

Dante was still rubbing his stomach (the kid sure packed a punch!) as he took a seat at his desk. "He'll be fine."

"Not that it's any of my business but, you're not going to get laid anytime soon by the way things are going," Trish said and trying not to laugh when she saw the look on the others face.

"Yeah, Thanks," Dante replied sarcastically. Nosy women always putting their two-cents into things, they swear they know _everything._ "Don't you have something to do like spend my money or something?"

"Oh, of course but I'm off to do a little errand with Patty," she said as she grabbed the keys to her bike. "And don't forget about the job uptown. You two were supposed to go a while ago."

That's right. There was a job he had to do with the kid. He could go by himself since the other was still angry with him but then Nero would be even angrier if Dante went without him since he was the one who insisted on taking the job.

"Have fun," the woman said teasingly as she left.

* * *

That's exactly what Dante needed, more time with an angry, pubescent male that, if provoked further, would cause Dante pain and suffering. Of course, that wouldn't stop the devil hunter from continuing his teasing. Oh no, never. Dante was dieing to see how much the kid could take. It was just too funny and cute seeing him riled up and red in the face. Nero said nothing to him since they left on their mission. They were on their way back now (it was a simple job), and he still hasn't said a word. He was not exactly very happy since all Dante could seem to do for the past week was violate him. As they made their way through the area, Nero made sure to walk _behind _the devil hunter. How cute, Dante thought, chuckling to himself. Nero and the word cute weren't allowed in the same sentence.

It was funny how they were together, an item, yet the kid would find anything sexually related awkward. Even a small kiss would leave Nero red in the face or any innocent gesture of the kind made Nero shy away. He was a hormonal mess and Kyrie didn't help. If anything she probably made it worse by telling him sex was bad. At least that's what Nero had told Dante a little while back.

It simply came up in the conversation, Dante asking (without getting killed) if Nero was still a virgin. Not very surprising when he said he still was and Kyrie not letting him do _anything _except hold her hand and give her small kisses. That was the limit to touching he had said. Oh and no tongue allowed.

Nero never got the chance to explore and do things a growing man should have already done by the time they hit 15. Dante wasn't exactly disappointed. He found it to his advantage somewhat. He was actually glad that he would be the one teaching Nero the things a man should do, even if it was with another man. Dante would be Nero's first. At least that's what the elder devil hunter wanted. The way things were going, though, nothing was coming out of Dante's "Lessons on Exploring Your Sexuality" except Nero beating the crap out of him and the fun from teasing him.

Nero's exasperated sigh made Dante snap out of his thoughts. He turned to the boy who had stopped walking and asked, "What's up?"

Nero shook his head, "I'm hungry, I'm gonna go grab something before I head back to the shop. You want something?"

"Actually… I think I do," Dante smirked before grabbing the kid by his collar and bringing close for a kiss. To Dante's dismay, it was over before it even started. Instead of Nero kissing back, he was given a hard punch to the gut for the fourth time today and the twentieth time this week alone.

"Idiot! Not out here!" Nero cried, cheeks red.

Dante took a second to wonder if the kisses were worth a hole through his stomach. That wouldn't be very attractive.

Angrily, Nero began to walk away, leaving Dante still rubbing his belly even though whatever bones the kid broke healed by then. "Hey kid! Bring me back something."

"Fuck you!" Nero called back, already down the street.

"Waiting for the day, kid!"

* * *

Dante, once back at the shop and sitting at his desk the usual way with his legs propped up on the desk and his arms behind his head, began contemplating. Yes the devil hunter actually thinks, people. Maybe Nero had a problem with him? Not as a person but being together as a couple. Dante was his first boyfriend, after all. Maybe he hasn't accepted being gay... or bi? Whatever, Dante wasn't much for labels. Still, maybe he really was intimidated being with another man rather than a woman. He seemed rather confidant with Kyrie. He just pushes Dante away when he gets to close. There had to be someway to break through the kid, not that he was rushing.

Okay maybe was. A man could only take so much sexual tension. But Dante did have self control. He was a gentleman after all.

Just then, Nero walked in, a pizza box in hand. "Here," he said as he handed the elder devil hunter the box.

Hell yeah! He was so hungry, too. He thought Nero was going to be a real ass and not get him anything. He opened the lid and all happiness was lost. It was definitely pizza, the whole pie, untouched and still warm. But…

"Pineapple?" Dante almost whined.

Nero rolled his eyes and sat at the edge of Dante's desk, opposite of where Trish usually was perched. "You're welcome."

"Thanks but… I don't really get along with Hawaiian pizza."

"If you're really hungry you'd eat it," Nero said, grabbing a slice for himself. "Besides, it was the last they had left. I didn't feel like waiting while they made another."

Dante swore that Nero only got it to spite him but he was nice enough to bring him _something_. He ended up picking out the pineapple slices and eating _only _four slices and opting to read one of his not-so-pornographic magazines. He really wasn't that hungry. He was too busy thinking about Nero, freakin' kid always in his thoughts. Everything he did now was all about Nero. His daily life included the young man almost 24/7 no matter how much they tried to avoid each other. He even sits on his desk all day if not on the couch until he gets bored enough to go play a video game or find something more interesting to occupy himself with. Even then, he'd steal one of Dante's not so slutty magazines, no matter how much Dante pressured him into looking at naked women, saying it's good for his health.

Dante couldn't help but chuckle at that. The kid really was way too innocent for his own good.

Nero looked at him with a raised brow but ignored him, saying once before that Dante at his age was bound to lose it one day. Removing himself from the desk, he grabbed the empty pizza box and moved to throw it out in the practically overflowing garbage bin in the kitchen. He would throw it out but then he'd end up cleaning the whole place again out of habit so he ignored it and walked back to the devil hunter's desk.

"Hey," Nero spoke up, breaking the 20 minute silence. Dante made a sound of acknowledgment, letting Nero know he was listening while reading. From the corner of his eye though, he saw the kid rub his nose, a sign that Dante already knew meant Nero was feeling a little awkward or nervous.

"I'm sorry... for hitting you and stuff."

Dante didn't move, only averted his eyes to the kid.

"I actually feel a _little_ bad for hitting you every time you would…you know," He continued, "So, yeah, sorry."

Yes, too cute and adorable for words Dante thought. He couldn't help but smile a little. The devil hunter stopped reading all together and tossed his book somewhere on his desk, and moved to take Nero by the wrist (good thing he was standing close enough) and pulled him to sit on his lap. Reluctantly the boy did so, letting himself get pulled over and fall onto the older man's lap with a sigh. Nero wasn't so pushy when it was just the two of them.

"It's alright, no harm done," Dante said as he lilted Nero's chin up with a finger and placing a soft kiss on his lips. "Except maybe a few broken bones and internal bleeding," he added jokingly, earning a soft punch on to his arm.

Nero turned a bit so he could place his arms around the other and closed his eyes when he felt Dante press his lips against his. Dante felt Nero's hold tighten as he leaned more into the kiss. Dante ran his tongue over the younger devil hunter's lips, silently seeking permission to explore more. Hesitantly, Nero opened his mouth to the other. Dante knew the kid was still a little shy when it came to these types of kisses. He hardly had any experience but Dante had no problem teaching him of course.

Nero let out a soft moan, making Dante shiver slightly, when the half-demon expertly ran his tongue along the inside of his mouth.

_Briiing Briiiiing!!_

Dante made a sound of disappointment when Nero broke the kiss.

"Leave it," Dante almost begged, moving his lips to the young mans neck and leaving soft kisses.

As Nero shifted slightly and attempted to reach for the phone Dante bit his neck a little roughly.

"D, Dante…" Nero started, annoyed. "What the hell?"

"Leave it," he repeated as he took Nero's human hand into his own making sure he wouldn't reach for the phone again. Eventually it stopped ringing much to Dante's relief.

"What if it was an important job?" Nero asked, sounding a bit disappointed with the older man. Apparently he didn't care seeing as he was still occupied with others neck, sucking and licking it.

The phone began to ring again. Dante let out a loud, frustrated sigh when Nero pulled away completely. Nero moved himself from the devil hunters lap and answered the phone. He's gonna have to invest on an answering machine.

"Hello, Devil May Cry."

Honestly… just when it was getting good! It was probably the longest and farthest Dante ever got with Nero. Damn it all!

Dante let out an aggravated huff and crossed his arms over his chest, earning a look from Nero as he continued to speak on the phone. Dante got up and went to the kitchen, leaving Nero to his conversation, in search for his beloved tomato juice. Unfortunately, there was none in the fridge and he let himself frown. But hope was not lost! There was still Trish's Hennessey and some of Nero's pineapple juice. He poured the entire bottle of the liquor into the container of remaining juice and shook it. When the devil hunter was satisfied, he walked back to see the younger devil slayer finished on the phone.

"Was it anyone important?" he mocked as he made his way to couch.

Nero frowned. "Just Kyrie."

"Oh. _Just Kyrie._ Didn't she break up with you?"

Nero shook his head. "She was just asking how things were going… she wants me to stop by sometime."

As Dante sat down, he took note on how Nero was speaking a little softer than normal. "What's the problem then?" He questioned as popped open the lid from the drink he'd been shaking for the past minute and finally took a swig.

"She's pregnant."

Dante almost choked. "What?"

"Yeah, she's due in June."

Dante couldn't believe it. Innocent Kyrie… pregnant? It was a little hard to imagine her with a huge belly but not so much seeing her with six kids. She seems like the type to have at least eight, Dante thought. He looked over to the kid was appeared to be lost in thought.

"You don't seem too happy."

"Oh, I am," he answered but immediately changed the subject. "Is that my pineapple juice?"

"Yes and no. Want some? It'll make you feel better."

Nero moved to sit next to Dante on the couch and was handed the plastic bottle and took a drink. Dante laughed when he saw Nero's eyes bug and swallow hard.

"What the hell is in there?! Acid?!"

"Just a _little_ bit of left over liquor," Dante smiled not so innocently.

"You are a horrible influence," Nero said with a straight face. "And that wasn't exactly a little bit."

"Okay, maybe there's a little bit more alcohol than juice."

Nero looked at Dante knowingly and the devil hunter laughed. "You're afraid of a little girly drink?"

As luck would have it, he pressed the wrong Nero button again. "No. It caught me off guard. I don't drink as often as you do."

Dante knew Nero was lying but he wasn't going to call him out. His previous caretaker, Credo, didn't seem like the type to let Nero do anything, especially after he heard about the ice-cream instance (1). He may act like a punk but the older man seemed like he had him in check.

Dante saw Nero take another drink from the bottle, this time squinting as he swallowed. He could already tell that younger man probably couldn't handle alcohol well. He wasn't going to stop him though. He _wanted _to loosen the kid up. It might do him good.

* * *

A while later, an empty juice container and a few empty beer containers, Nero was a little tipsy. Only a little, Nero kept reminding Dante when asked if he was drunk. His theory was proven correct. But then again, whatever Dante thought was a pussy drink was usually not for a human. Only about an 8th of the drink was diluted with juice so Nero might as well have drank the bottle Hennessy straight. Dante only took one more sip before letting the boy have it and grabbing a few beers he forgot he had in the fridge. Of course Nero wanted one too but one became three. Dante had to take the bottle away from him before he fell over with it.

"Oh come on," Nero slurred slightly. "I wasn't done."

"I think you've had enough," Dante a said as he placed the bottle away from the other mans reach.

"I'm fine," Nero attempted to take Dante's beer but only succeeded in falling on top of him.

"You okay kid?" Dante asked, raising one eyebrow when Nero didn't move from his chest.  
"The room started spinning…" he replied.

Dante smiled as he helped Nero back to a sitting position, well at least tried his best as the boy laughed adorably (2) for some reason. He thought getting a few drinks in Nero would help loosen him up a bit but he had no idea it would work so well. It was too cute in Dante's eyes seeing Nero so off guard and laughing.

"Dante! Come on," He whined sinking more into the couch.

"What?" Dante grinned.

"Let me get another one, ass hole."

"Another what?"

"A beer, idiot."

"Oh sure, of course, since you asked so nicely," Dante started sarcastically, grin still on his face as he passed Nero back the beer but only to take it back when the boy reached for it, causing the younger white haired male to frown.

"Not until I get a kiss from you."

Even in his drunken state Nero refused, cheeks turning pink. Dante couldn't believe it.

"I guess you don't want it that bad," Dante said as he placed it back away from the kids reach. Just as Dante leaned back into the couch, Nero grabbed Dante by his shirt and pulled him into a kiss.

Finally some initiative! A breakthrough! The kiss was a little sloppy but he still enjoyed it. When did Dante not enjoy kissing him even when he got hurt after?

He let his eyes close when he felt Nero run his tongue along his bottom lip. Without hesitation he opened his mouth for the other, letting Nero slip his tongue in and tasting every bit of him.

Nero broke the kiss when he felt himself being pinned against the couch with Dante on top.

"What the hell are you doing?" Nero asked, frowning a bit.

"Just trying to get comfortable," Dante replied, moving his lips to the other man neck and nipping the soft skin there. "I promise I'll be good."

"You owe me a beer, old man," Nero said, straight to the point.

Dante stopped briefly to look at him. "I lied." Nero pouted and the other chuckled.

Not trying to waste anymore time Dante continued, and pressed his lips against the younger males once more this time deepening the kiss.

Nero made a sound of protest, really wanting his beer, but let himself melt under Dante. If in his drunken state he hoped the other wouldn't go too far. He let his arms wrap around the other's neck, the fingers of his devil arm combing through Dante's white hair.

The elder had one arm to beside the boys head to keep him propped up while the other rested on Nero's side. He tried not to move his hands anywhere near the others ass or crotch since it would cut his make-out time short and earn him a very violent reaction from the other. He was sure it would still happen even though the other was a drunken mess. He was still shy and still a possibility he would freak out.

But what if he didn't? The "what if" thoughts was what caused Dante to end up in the abused end of the situation. Dante tried his luck and ran his hand up the boys side then running it down again before reaching up to unzip the others hoody. The garment fell open and Dante had easer access to the boy's shirt. He snaked his hand under the shirt and began caressing the soft and warm skin there, making the boy shiver under his touch.

Then he heard the door open and little footsteps patter in. "Hey Dante! I need... oh, never mind," Patty giggled.

Nero immediately broke the kiss and forcefully pushed Dante off him. Well, at least he didn't get hit in the gut. Instead, Nero quickly got up and left the room, well, as quickly as he could without falling over or crashing into the wall.

Dante let out the most frustrated sound he could muster. Fucking females and their bad timing! He thought he was going to strangle Patty.

"What do you need?" He asked through gritted teeth. He almost had him! Damn it all.

He heard Trish laughing in amusement from behind Patty who looked a little offended by Dante's tone.

"I'm sorry, did I disrupt your sex ed class?" Trish chuckled.

He really was going to end up killing her one day.

-End-

* * *

I have nothing against Ladies of DMC but you know they're in the way! XD Gotta love cock-blockers and their terrible timing.

GAWD I havent written anything in such a long time! I hope you like. I promise a lemon soon.

Foot notes:

(1) From my fanfic "The Many Flavors of Ice-cream" TBA

(2) Nero laughing adorably sounds something like Tamaki's laugh. To witness the absolute adorableness, click on the link that's on my profile. Not even Dante could resist something like that.


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